We’ve been quite unmotivated lately, save for a recent visit from the fantastic Elizabeth and Family.  Other than their few days here, we’ve been content to sit at home and do basically nothing.  I don’t know if it’s because it’s August and it’s hot and dead around here?  Or if it’s because it’s tourist season and I’d rather sit at home than deal with crowds of tourists?  Or if it’s because we’re still recovering from our Iceland vacation?  Of if I’m just depressed that I didn’t make Chief and don’t take rejection well?  Or of it’s because we have reliable intel that a flock of flying alien cows are going to descend on the base and take us to Jimmy Hoffa’s body if we leave for more than an hour?  Hmm, maybe we should go somewhere…

At any rate, this laziness has extended to pretty much everything, including not working out and not cooking real dinners anymore.   Thank God for Cup of Noodles.

So help me out, claque, throw out some suggestions of Things to Do to Entertain Ourselves.  Except for flicking each other’s noses, because we’re totally on top of that.

So the results came out yesterday and as I had pretty much figured, I didn’t make it.

I’ve always maintained a good grasp on reality during this whole process and though I hoped I’d make it, and though I have built up some confidence in myself, I really didn’t think this would be my time.

But thank you, thank you to all of you who supported me unconditionally, who didn’t dash my hopes by pointing out the reality that I already knew.

It’ll be great when it finally happens, you’ll all probably be as excited as me.

I would venture to guess if a telemarketer called me today, this is approximately the same conversation I would have with them:

Angry British Telecom Conversation

I’ve never been one much for anxiety.  I’ve felt very fortunate to have avoided it.  I have had 2 anxiety attacks in my life; the first was the night before I went out to sea in 2004.  That was horrible.  I don’t remember when the 2nd was, but I’m pretty sure it was right around when I was getting ready to go to Iraq, though it wasn’t as bad as the one before the ship.

I haven’t had another since, but I have now been living in a state of frequent anxiety for the last month or so.  Every single time I think about the Chief’s results coming out, I start feeling anxious.  The closer the day gets, the worse it gets.  The rumors that keep coming out of when the results will be out aren’t helping either:  It’s Friday!  It’s Monday!  It’s Wednesday!  I JUST CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE.

I really just want to know so I can move on one way or another.  This is the first time I’ve taken the test or been up for it, and I’m up for it early, so my chances of making it are even lower (at their best, the chances are only 2% that I’ll make it) .  But I just want to KNOW, and I want to celebrate my friends that certainly will make it!

I’m cursing the Corvette right now - I think I exceeded my quota for good luck for a lifetime!

Edited: Sorry - I’ve closed the comments. This really isn’t a “please validate me” kind of post, just the griping and venting of being frustrated by the lack of information and abundancy of baseless rumors!

I’ve struck gold: AFN commercials on YouTube!

Before marrying a local national, you might want to watch this spot first.

As most of my friends and family can attest, I have a little bit of a problem with being scatterbrained. Perhaps no one knows this better than Walter Bean, who not only lived with me but had the somewhat unfortunate feature of being a woman living with me. Because really, B being my husband, he knows one side of me. My parents know another side of me. My brothers know just an eensy weensy bit of me which mostly consists of me screaming for 15 years straight. But my girlfriends, my few but great girlfriends, they know a different part of me. The part that’s in some ways the most me. Maybe not even that it’s the most me but it’s the way that only another woman can understand. Now my mom, yes, she’s another woman, but really, can you talk about vibrators with your mom*? And really, would you want to?

Back to the topic of being scatterbrained, recently, we’ve been organizing stuff around the house. After all, we’ve been here for over 19 months now and it’s about time maybe we thought about settling in? Last weekend, despite my cold (I’d call it more like “near-death-non-dramatic-almost-pneumonia”), we hit the laundry room/large storage closet. The laundry room, you see, was remniscent of the laundry room in my house growing up, the kind where you always wonder if maybe mom and dad might just have a body hidden in there? My parents had the luxury of having a laundry room the size of half of my current house (I’m not kidding), which meant you really could stash a lot of shit in there**.

Right. Scatterbrained.

The laundry room got cleaned up to the point of echoing. The acoustics in there used to be good enough to produce a radio show. See, Dad, you don’t need those egg-crate-foam mattress pads, you can just let us live there for a few months and you’ll have great acoustics, too! Not only did the laundry room get cleaned out, the adjoining storage closet did as well. After taking several days off to recouperate from my near-death-non-dramatic-pneumonia, I decided to further organize the closet today by working on my scrapbooking supplies.

I haven’t scrapbooked in about a year, so it was fun seeing all the crap I’ve spent my money on so it could sit in a closet. One of the things I went through in my near-OCD organization was a drawer full of cards: some blank, some handmade, some pre-purchased. One of them, my favorite of the bunch, was the card I bought 3 years ago, wrote in, and inexplicably stuck back in the drawer to sit and apparently age?

In the mass organization, I realized I am really bad at remembering dates: birthdates, anniversaries, children’s birthdates, OB/GYN appointments, etc. So basically, my point in this really long and somewhat self-humiliating post is to ask if my claque could please email me their birthdates, anniversaries, children’s birthdates, and really, if you’d like, OB/GYN appointments. I’ll send a sympathy card for that one.

*Minor disclaimer, I don’t really talk too much about vibrators with my friends, really not at all, but it’s just to illustrate a point. A slightly tangential point. But a point nonetheless.

**I don’t know who lay claim to the dirty magazines in the box next to the defunct desk but I totally knew they were there. SO not cool to find as a 12 year old girl who already had issues with her boobs. Just thought you should know.

Before it got to a certifiable riot amongst the commentors (you only need 3 to have a riot, you know), I thought I’d get back in the saddle and start posting again.

I’m finally shaking this cold. I’ve been feeling a lot better but I have this icky emphyzemaish-sounding cough that makes me think of how my brother is going to sound in another 2 years if he doesn’t stop smoking. That was a hint, and this is making it not at all subtle. My ears are sticky and I find myself snorting a lot from the remnants of earlier this week’s misery, but all in all, I’m feeling a lot better.

Not only that, I’ve finally wrapped up most of the major task I had this week. We got a new person in at work and I was sponsoring her during her transition. This came at a very convenient time for me being ill, because it meant I didn’t have to go into work much and I got off about an hour early every day. I’m glad to have another person at work, and not a moment too soon - my other coworker is leaving for leave next week en route to Iraq. Please keep her as well as everyone else over there in your thoughts and prayers to come home safely.

I wasn’t here last summer as most of you know, because I myself was in Iraq. The weather in August, to quote an acquaintence-contractor who is still in Baghdad, is partly cloudy with a high temperature of Satan’s asshole. The temperature in Rota is much more pleasant, though it did get up over 100° a few days this week. Usually it’s in the upper 80s/low 90s with a light breeze - very nice. The weather is perfect this time of year if you’re considering visiting Spain - not the crappy January weather, but the lovely summer weather. I’m beside myself with excitement that next week, the fantastic Elizabeth and family will be coming to visit!! I can’t wait.

And just to make up for my extended absence on here, how about a little flashback?

August 3, 2006: Solving the Crisis in the Middle East