Still trying to figure out why we wear all white

Have I ever mentioned that however proud I am of Navy heritage, there is one thing that I think is nothing less than Just Plain Dumb, and that is called “Whites”.

As in a white uniform. White shirt. White pants. White.

Seriously, WHO wears white clothes, top to bottom, every day for 6 months? Come on now. And can I just say, whomever it was that decided to put us in all white, head to toe, must have been a man thinking, “Those women want equality, I’ll give them equality!” because SERIOUSLY, I can think of at least 6 weeks of the 6 months of wearing whites where half of my workday is spent in a paranoid, frenzied state of worrying whether I will be sneaking out of the office with a duffle bag behind me.

Today was a particularly not good day for whites. First it was commented to me that I must be very brave to vacuum out my car in my whites, to which my response was: I must have been REALLY brave to have gotten IN my car in my whites in the state it was in. And then it was commented that maybe I should not be PUTTING OUT A FIRE in my whites.

It was an eventful day, to say the least.

It was a very small fire and was probably caused by some idiot throwing their cigarette butt out of their car because it was right by the parking lot and it was dried leaves. IDIOTS IDIOTS IDIOTS. Smoke all you want but have just a wee little bit of common sense not to throw your burning butt ANYWHERE outside, much less a place full of dry leaves when it hasn’t rained in who-knows-how-long. If you need a reason not to, please, think about my whites.

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