There is really only one other person that I know of that could really understand this, and that is someone with whom I was stationed on the USS Lincoln.  He is also married to an Icelander, and we got to know each other a bit on the ship and then we got together after the ship and his wife and my family all had dinner together - a traditional Icelandic dinner, of course.

I fell in love with Iceland.  I can’t explain why very well, and I’m not completely sure why it has had such an effect on me, but it’s something that I’ve been thinking about a lot over the last few months.  When we left Iceland at the end of 2002, we had planned on coming back if we got stationed in Europe.  We had gotten orders to Iceland before getting them taken away due to the base closing.  Our runner-up choice was Spain, and the first thing we started planning was going back to Iceland at our first opportunity.  That first opportunity was this summer.  I was so excited to be going back.  And then Iraq popped into the picture. 

And now my family is back in Iceland, without me.  I am SO HAPPY for them, but at the same time, so unhappy that I couldn’t go along.  I’m missing all these memories.  I’m missing going to summer houses, taking the kids berry picking and to pet the horses, wandering through fields, playing games, eating real Icelandic food, going to the lakes, walking along the beaches picking sea glass…I’m missing this:

iceland tour confirmed

12 July 2006

we are pleased to announce that in addition to the free outdoor reykjavík concert on july 30th, the band will go on a long-awaited iceland tour, beginning in a couple of weeks. they will be playing eight small dates across the icelandic countryside at the end of july and beginning of august, all of which will be free of admission. these are very low key dates and we will not be listing them on the site, although those attending the reykjavík show may find a few clues as to their whereabouts. all the iceland dates will be being recorded and filmed for a future dvd release.

I’m missing getting to see B’s nieces again, and his brothers and sister and mom and dad and grandma.  I don’t get to go to the Westmann Islands and throw puffins into the ocean, or go to the touristy stuff and bring back memories.  I can’t take the photos I’ve dreamed of taking of the surreal, mottled landscapes and unimaginable skies.  I even miss the crappy weather; I miss dressing warm and complaining about how cold and rainy it is because then you get to come in and have coffee and talk and warm up in such a nice way. 

And of course, the family.  I miss them so much.  I got to talk to them last night for just a couple of seconds each before B’s phone card ran out of money.  It had been a while since I talked to the kids last and it was really hard to hear them and not be able to see them, or to touch them or hold them or any of it.  It’s a little bit easier with B because we email every day and can communicate well in writing, but with the kids I don’t have that.  I just want to go home.  Wherever home is now.